Sunday, 3 February 2013

Aussie Life

G'day mate, in this short post we will discuss just how you... can become Aussie. How to roam the deserts, set up the barbecue  and tame your neighborhood kangaroo. How to tune the teley, wrestle crocs, keep your pet koala and buy an aesthetically suitable knife in which to most effectively empty the Vegemite jar... By understanding these simple rules, even you can be Aussie.

1. Kangaroos: Yes, they roam the Aussie outback, and we all have them as pets and ride them to school. Yes, we 'hop' everywhere and cannot complete the simple task of walking. They hop in the cities too, around the streets and in the shopping malls.

2. The Barbie: In Australia, we live for the barbecue  settling down every weekend for a sunday barbie. We eat nothing which isn't from the barbie, and have never heard of the term vegetable.

3. Croc Wrestling: In Australia, everybody and anybody who has every handled wildlife is named Steve Irwin. We wear rounded leather hats with small sized tank tops and some thongs to round it off. With this simple attire, even you can become the next Steve Irwin.

4: Attire:  Dress Code (to life) : When travelling, playing sports, going to the mall (yes we have those, but more on that in another post), going to work, studying in school or doing anything, you may only wear: a singlet, thongs, bikini's and hats with corks dangling from them. They must also only be branded as Billabong, Ripcurl or Quicksilver.

5. Vegemite: Our staple food, the only food we eat for every meal and snack of the day (after barbecue food). It is in every pantry or kitchen of every house in the country. Before purchase in the 'Vegemite' section of every supermarket in Australia, please also buy the technologically advanced knifes, created long ago for the easy of completely emptying the Vegemite jar.

By following these simple steps, you can live the day to day life of an Australian, and experience the rich and diverse culture and way of life in which we are known for.

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