I’ve just realized an odd truth about
myself, its category still unknown to me. Good or bad its interpretation can be
seen either way, but sometimes it can just be a useful skill to have (not
because you haven’t done your homework…). Have you ever been walking alone,
suddenly realizing that a teacher who is either currently teaching you, or has
taught you previously is about to walk by. What do you do? Turn around
suddenly? Walk by awkwardly? Well, I’ve named it the Art of Invisibility. A big
user of public transport, I find myself stuck when there is a teacher on the
bus I’m about to board, or one in front of me when I alight. It usually ends as
a standoff in my mind, whether the other person is participating is irrelevant,
so the invisibility aspect comes with timing.
1.
Look down, hope that you’re
wearing a hat, and definitely not the school uniform which is bright green.
2.
Let them make the first move,
wait for them to stand up, walk down the aisle and leave
3.
Hope that you aren’t on a trip
more than a few stops, otherwise you’ll have to get off at the next stop and
wait another 15 minutes for the next bus.
4.
Even if on a short trip, alight
at the next stop if the teachers on board include (only because they’ll spot
you a mile away no matter how good you are, or how much you’ve practiced):
a.
The counselor (always has those invisibility seeking goggles
on)
b.
The Principal
c.
The Vice-Principal
d.
Anybody involved with the
principal (yes even cleaners)
5.
If boarding, stand or sit as
far away as possible and DEFINITELY AVOID EYE CONTACT.
What to do if you
accidentally made eye contact:
a. Nothing happened, they
didn’t see you and if they mention it to you later, they must be mistaking you
for someone else.
b. Look away immediately and
they didn’t see you so it’ll be fine.
c. Think about alighting at
the next bus stop(it’s always a good idea…)
6.
PRAY, AND I REALLY MEAN PRAY,
that they don’t start a conversation on the bus ride (because you know already
that it’s going to be awkward)
With this perfected after many years of
practice, you will be invisible to the teacher, and you’ll avoid those awkward
moments everyone hates.
Good Luck and I hope this works for you
Hilarious. Great light and funny tone. Every morning I see you at the bus stop and I keep wanting to stop and embarrass you, but you haven't been there for a few days. Just wait ;)
ReplyDeletehaha, luckily I've been on a slightly earlier bus to the people who i usually meet... Don't make me leave home earlier just to catch that bus!
Delete